My Friend and His Love Interest -

One day during lunch recess Arshad confided a secret to me – “you Know, I am in love”
I laughed loudly. Arshad was a new student in our school. Earlier he used to study somewhere else, but got admission in our school due to recommendation of our Urdu teacher. He was lean, tall, but a handsome guy who was quite taciturn and introvert. He had very limited friend say one or two. Generally, he would avoid school uniform and come in fancy dress.  Many times, he got scolding for it by the class teacher. I heard, he had written some genuine excuse for not coming in uniform, after that class teacher stopped scolding him. Except this aberration, otherwise he was a disciplined student.

Arshad was elder to me; not only me,  he was elder to all students of our batch. He was weak in study and in first trimester in Xth class, except Urdu and Farsi, either he failed or just got pass marks in other subjects. I came to know that, his abbu had sent him to Mumbai for job when he failed in class viii. He worked there for almost three years and there he realized the importance of study.  Maulvi sahib (Urdu teacher of our school) helped him getting admission in our school. He had no big academic ambition; just he wanted to pass matriculation. One day he told me that in Mumbai,  one who is not tenth pass is considered as uneducated. He wanted to pass matriculation, so that he could not be considered as uneducated in Mumbai. 

Arshad had very clear idea about his future. After matriculation, he would learn suit stitching for five years and during that time, he would collect all salary in bank account. When the bank account would be full of money, then he would purchase a tailoring shop and start his business. He was confident that within ten to fifteen years he would be richest man in his colony. I never contradicted him because whenever I wanted to tell the importance of education he would tell me Mumbai and its lifestyle.  I had never been to Mumbai and his Mumbai talk used to intimidate me. He had told me so many glamorous stories about Mumbai that many times I contemplated to visit Mumbai immediately after passing the matriculation.

A girl in our class was my friend’s love interest. She was the daughter of a doctor and she was a bright student. Her father was only M.D. ( there were many M.B.B.S doctors but no one was M.D. ) in the town, not only that he had travelled hajj twice. He was a good medical professional, used to lead a simple life and a gentle man in every aspect.  He enjoyed a great respect from the local people.  Our school was three kilometer faraway from his quarter but his children (the girl- my school mate, the son- one class junior) would come school by walk. My friend used to think that he was in love with that girl.

Everyday he would write a letter to her and show me for content and spelling check. I used to find his letter very melodramatic and strange. I would disapprove his writing; he would get angry and tear the letter. This routine continued for almost one week. One day he got very angry with me. That day I did not say anything about his letter. He decided that he would deliver the letter but he could not do so. Deep inside, he had fear of rejection from the girl.

One day I advised him- “why not you change your plan and try to become doctor. If you do so, your chance of getting her would be very high”. He ridiculed my thought. “Oh! You do not know anything about love and its story”. He told me many filmy stories in that boys doing menial job or job that do not need higher education married to educated and well to do girls”.  That day I came to know that there is a world beyond books too. I was very impressed with his filmy knowledge. He recommended me many movies to watch to understand love story. Unfortunately, I could not do in my school time but his argument whetted my appetite to watch movies.

The girl was good friend of mine. Until eighth class, many times we had tiffin together in common room. Her brother who was one class junior to me, used to take my help in mathematics and physics. One day, when school was over she talked with me about Arshad. “You are a good guy. You should not spend time with him. He is not serious about study. He does not come in uniform. Moreover, I do not like, the way he sees me”.
I heard her advice and assured her that I would not talk with him. Next day I told him very clearly that I would not be his friend anymore. He was disappointed. When he asked reason, I did not tell him anything.

After that, I came to know that Arshad finally delivered a love letter to her. She complained about it to maulvi sir. Maulvi sir gave him almost one-hour sermon and he got so affected by that incident that he became irregular in attendance.

When our matriculation result was out, after my result, I checked his result too. He was passed matriculation with second division. I was very happy for him. When I enquired about him to my junior who was his neighbor, I came to know that he already shifted to Mumbai. After that, I never heard of him.

~~~ Ramanuj Dubey

Didi, Books & I

I was in class six or seven when I first met with Didi. She had come to live in our neighborhood. Her father was in the education department and earlier he was posted in other districts. This time her father got posting in home district, so they shifted in their ancestral home that was in my neighborhood. They were perhaps distant relative of my family from my mother side.

I saw didi first time, when I went to her house to inform and invite in the puja ceremony that was going to take place in my house. She called me in and in a breath; I informed her about the schedule of puja and requested all family member to attend it. She smiled and told me to sit on sofa. After that, she asked about my name, school, friends and my hobby. She offered me a glass of sherbet that I refused. Then, she gave comics to read that I accepted immediately. She pampered me and I liked her from bottom end of my heart.

After coming from the school, usually I used to spend evening time alone on the roof playing virtual cricket. I used to throw a plastic ball against the wall and depending upon the boomeranged distance, I would count the run. I would throw ten over for each team and then depending on run, I would declare who won the match. This game was entirely my invention; secretly I used to feel proud about it. One day   I was playing virtual cricket on my roof and when I threw the ball, incidentally it reached to her house. When I went her house to pick up the ball, she saw me. I went inside her home and chatted with her whole evening. She had many old children magazines – Nandan, Parag, Balhans, Bal Bharti, Champak etc and comics of all famous character – Chacha Choudhry, Pinky, Dhruv, Bankelal etc. Besides that, she had good collection of novels. From that day, I made a habit to go her house in evening and take one to two books from her. Next day I would return the book and then again take two books. Within six months, I exhausted her magazine and comics collections. Then after, I switched on to novels. I would take a novel from her and finish that in two- three days. Many times she would ask the story to check whether I had read the book or not. I never failed in her test. At that time, I used to purchase only children magazine Nandan but after that, I would purchase all children magazine and comics that used to come in the town. Within a year, I also had a good collection of books, now I used to give her new books. She would read children magazine with enthusiasm.

Didi had a harmonium and occasionally she used to play it. Somebody told me she sings very well. One day I went to her and expressed my desire to hear song from her. She looked surprised to see my interest in music. She told to come next day and next day when I went there she was already doing riyaz. She sang few songs. She had good voice and I praised her profusely.

When I was in class eight, she was doing master in Hindi literature.  One day I was going market, carrying a bag in my hand, I saw didi with her friends coming from the college. She called me and introduced me to all her friends. I was feeling shy, but she made to recite few poems from my syllabus (textbook). Her all friends applauded me. I was very much delighted.

I was in perhaps class X, when she got married. I actively participated in her marriage ceremony and assisted the family. I felt very emotional inside when she was going to bridegroom’s house.

One day I came to know that Didi has come to her father’s house. In the evening, I went to see her. When I went there, I saw her writing something. She welcomed me and offered some sweets.  she was writing some letters and exhorted me to wait in drawing room. Almost half an hour passed, she continued to write. I was still waiting in the drawing room. I felt ignored. Without informing her, I came to my house. I locked up my room and wept bitterly. After that, I never met her.

~~~ Ramanuj Dubey 

Ek Chhoti si Village Love Story

This is the story of almost one  decade back. The story is about love. A village love story. A small love story- ek chhoti si village love story. There are two characters of the story – he and she. Besides that, other characters are whole villagers.

He was 24. She was 18. He was tenth pass. She was sixth fail. He was well built and dark. She was tall, thin and fair. He had some agriculture land; he used to take care of it. She had few goats; she used to look after them. He was from kushwaha caste, the dominant caste in that village. She was from barber caste, just four families in the village, a minority caste in numbers in that village.

He had few acres land and he used to spend time in the field, looking after the crops. She had a small piece of land abutting his field. Her goat used to graze in that field. Sometimes goats would stray and reach to his field. One day he warned her about the undisciplined behavior of goat. During warning, first time he noticed her beauty, her big eyes, guava like breast and slender body. He kept his attitude stern, but deep inside he liked her. That was the first time, he abused her mentioning her private part, and he was happy. He felt, as if he expressed his love to her.

Next day, she was having breakfast in her field, meanwhile few goats entered into his field. He thought, as if it was an acceptance of love from her side. He ran after the goat to drive them away from the field. After driving the goat, he came to her field and pounced on her. She cried, and he abused her. She resisted but he tore her blouse. She was weeping but he made love to her. When the act was over, she was shocked. She was unable to understand, what just happened to her. He kissed her and said- I lubh you. Then she realized- oh! It was love. She too reciprocated – I lubh you.
In metro and big cities, you may call above behavior, eve teasing, molestation, rape and what not but for both of them it was love. She accepted his weird way to express love. They were in love now. Sudhh desi romance.

This story spread in the village like a wild fire. Earlier In few instances, barber family had accused other people for molesting their women. Panchayat never acted against the accused, all time they let off the culprits lightly. This one was an isolated case. The girl was accused of love (?). Panchayat was called and they shamed the girl’s father. Panchayat interrogated the girl and she accepted her love for him. Panchayat fined five thousand rupees to her father and he had to accept it. As both boy and girl were in love and adamant to marry, panchayat had no option to allow the marriage. Then came the issue of dowry. Her father was not willing to give any dowry for this love marriage. It was seen that the girl was more vociferous for giving dowry than anyone else. The only piece of land that was abutting to his field was given to him as dowry. Both were happy. After that, they got married.

I knew the boy, and in my knowledge  this was the first inter- caste marriage in  that area. After two years of the marriage, one day I saw one of boy's relatives in the local market. When I asked about  boy and his wife, he saw me with surprise. “Don’t you know she died after six month of marriage only?”- He said. I was shocked.
“How did she die?”- I asked.
“We finished her”- without any compunction he spoke. Then he added- “What do you think, a barber girl will be able to adjust in our family. She was nothing but headache for us.”
“What about the land, which you received in dowry?”- I asked.
“Have you heard anywhere return of dowry in any circumstances?”- He replied me with a question.

I had no answer of this question. I was shocked and sad to see the tragic end of this love story.

PS :-  I heard this bizarre but racy story from an agricultural laborer . His description of the event made me interested in this story.  Though they were not from my village but the disastrous end of the story  lingered in my mind for long.

~~~ Ramanuj Dubey

Pond, Ghost & I

There was a pond at the outskirt of the village. There was five feet wall around the pond and it was surrounded by oleander trees. This pond was well maintained during my childhood. This pond was not a public pond, it was owned by a family but every villager had access to that pond. There was a cricket field ground near by the pond where youths of the village used to play in the evening. There was a mango tree in front of the pond. Under the mango tree, the villagers used to conduct pinddan rituals during death ceremony of family member. Pinddan is a Hindu ritual in that elder/ eligible son of the family offers the rice ball to the dead person / ancestors so that the soul rest in peace. In childhood, we believed that many ghosts lived on that tree.

One day my schoolmate told me that he saw a ghost on that tree last night. I became curious to know further, but he would not tell. When I goaded him, he divulged – “last night, when I was going to pond to wash my feet, I saw a ghost sitting on the tree”.
“How old he was? How he was looking? What he was doing? Did he tell anything to you?” – I hurled a volley of question to him.
He narrowed his eyes and in a very weird way looked at me. After few second he started – “you are asking how old he was. He must have been four- five hundred years old. He was so old that his skin was sagging from the bone. I saw his face, full dark and he was playing with fire on his mouth. He would throw fire in air and catch it in the mouth. When he saw me that time I put my leg in water. He told me to put leg in water only; otherwise, he would burn my leg. When he finished eating fire then he told me to run away from there. He told me not to tell anybody otherwise I would fall ill for three days”.

After that story, he did not come to school for three days. I was worried for him. His uncle was a priest and he used to visit my grandfather regularly. I asked about him to his uncle. His uncle told me he was not well but he would be all right in one or two days. I believed his story about meeting with ghost.

I also wanted to meet the ghost. The pond was around three hundred meters far away from my house. I came to know that generally ghost was seen there between seven and eight o’clock in the night.  I decided to visit the pond every night without telling anybody in home. By running, I would go there, stay sometime on the branch of oleander tree and then come back again by running. The whole process used to take half an hour.  I visited more than ten times but I could not meet with ghost.  Meanwhile, one incident took place in my village. There was a teacher in my village who was a good friend of my grandfather. In the morning he was plucking the oleander flower from the tree in his garden and, a snake that was on the branch of the tree, bit him. His life could not be saved. He died due to snakebite .This incident shook me from inside. I used to wait for ghost sitting on the branch of oleander tree only. I decided not to visit that place again. I wanted to meet ghost but not putting my life in danger.

When I was in class ten, I revealed the story to my grandfather. He laughed. "Oh ! ghost does not exist. your friend told you a nonsense story"- he told .
"But baba, do not we read in hanuman chalisa - bhoot pichas nikat nahi aawe, mahawir jab nam sunawe ( ghost & devil spirit do not come near to you , if you chant the name of lord Hanuman) - I expressed my doubt. He changed the stand.
 “Oh! true, very true ! How can ghost come near to you? Do not you see, we have hanuman temple and dhwaja  in the house.”
“But I was searching ghost nearby pond, far away from our home”- I had doubt in my mind.
He smiled and said – “every ghost knows that we have hanuman ji. They will not bother you; they will not come near to you. So, promise me, you will not search any ghost in future”.
I promised him, I would not  search  ghost in future. He looked relieved.

I kept my promise and never searched for any ghost.

~~~ Ramanuj Dubey

My First Earning --

This is the story of Inter second year. That day I woke up early, took bath, had breakfast and instead of college, I went to Radio Station Bhagalpur. When I reached radio station, it was around 10am. The security guard of the station stopped me.
“I need to visit yuvvani department. I have got some work with them”- I explained.
“Do you have any recording today or any contract paper? Who do you want to meet”- he demanded.
“No. I have not come here for recording but I have no less important work than recording. I have few enquiries and I need answer from them. Hope, you are satisfied now.”- I completed my argument.
The security guard was a typical watchman and he further inquired many things. When he got satisfied then he allowed me to sign on the visitors register. That was my first experience dealing with security guard of any organization.

I entered into the Radio station building, asked peon for yuvvani department and knocked the door of the office. One middle-aged official was sitting there. I greeted him, told him about my name, age, college and asked, “I want to participate in the quiz contest programme broadcasted by your department”. That time yuvvani used to broadcast quiz contest perhaps every Wednesday/ Thursday. In the contest, four youth used to participate.  I liked the format of the programme and wanted to participate.
“Generally we take participant who are writing the competitive examination. You are just in Intermediate. You should prepare for you course study now. When you will start writing competitive examination, then you should approach us”- He commented.

I was disheartened. When I was about to leave the room, he called me again and asked – “Why do you feel that you should participate in the quiz contest? Did anybody send you here?”.
“No body has sent me here. Last week I listened to the programme and I knew the answer of thirty-six question out of forty. I was playing the game in my home along with participants when it was being broadcasted and I did better than two participants .I thought why should not I participate”
He smiled and said – “Why not I should check your general knowledge now .” and he asked around ten questions from history to current affairs. Except two questions, (one question I still remember – who is the foreign secretary of India, other question was from economics), I answered all question correctly. He congratulated me and noted down my address and phone number. He told me he would call me for any other programme.

Around after three months, I got a call from the yuvvani to participate in debate. The topic was – ‘the effect of cinema on youth’.  I was delighted to know it. That was my first recording and I prepared on the subject as much as I could do till recording time .The debate went well and I spoke effectively.  Everybody including participants congratulated me. After that, I signed the contract paper for the programme and next day I received the cheque of one hundred fifty rupees. I was on cloud nine.

I came home with the cheque and touched the feet of elders (an old tradition of my family). As this was my first earning, I handed over the cheque to my mother. She told me to give that cheque to grandfather, as he was guardian of the family. I gave that to my grandfather but he refused to take. He told to spend the money as per my wish. I was perplexed.  

It was a big question for me how to spend one hundred and fifty rupees.  When I checked my need list, I had everything what I required except a radio. There was an old Murphy radio in my house and my grandfather used to listen to all India radio news & BBC news on it. Sometimes I would listen to Hindi songs on it. I checked the market for price and found out local made good radio was available on one hundred seventy rupees. This was my first earning and I wanted to offer prasadam worth of twenty-one rupees to Hanuman Baba. My total estimated expenditure was coming one hundred ninety-one rupees and I had only one hundred fifty rupees in my hand. Still I needed forty-one rupees. I was happy without any money, now this debate remuneration put me in more trouble. Two days passed and I could not decide what to do. I was too proud to ask money from anyone for purchasing radio.

I was sad, and my grandfather noticed it. First, I did not want to disclose my problem but when he persisted, I told him everything. He laughed when he heard my problem. Immediately he gave me fifty rupees and my problem was solved. I offered prasadam to Hanuman baba next day and the same day I purchased a radio.

Now, the radio is out of order but my mother has kept it safely in trunk as a memory of my first earning.

~~~ Ramanuj Dubey

My Tryst with Weapon and Range Firing ..

The two teams from the two villages were playing cricket in the village cricket ground. The first inning was over and the second team was chasing the required runs to win the match. After few over, it became apparent that first team would lose the match. The player of first team looked frustrated and they would appeal for out unnecessary. The players ‘frustration brought uneasiness among the spectators. Meanwhile a supporter of first team, who had a desi katta in his hand, came running towards the centre of the ground. After reaching the crease, he fired in the sky. A chaos prevailed there and all the spectators ran opposite direction of the field. I was in the spectators and that was my first encounter with weapon.

When I came home, I recounted the whole incidence to the grandfather. I was thrilled to see a person-carrying gun came to the field and fired and his act made people to flee away from there. My grandfather looked worried to see my admiration for gun and the man. That night, he told many stories and tried to convince me that gun was not good for humanity and those who believed in gun were not less than monster and beast.

After few months of that incident, I had second encounter with weapon. It was summer and a Barat party (bridegroom’s family and friends come to bride’s home on the marriage day) had come to my village to attend marriage. The youths were dancing on the tune of band party and few of them were waving the guns in the air. After that, they fired many rounds in the air. I was fascinated with gun. I too wanted to have a gun and fire in the air.

My third encounter with weapon took place at my friend’s village. It was last day of Durga Puja and my friend invited me to attend the Idol immersion ceremony. During immersion ceremony, many villagers had weapons in their hand and few of them were on horse with rifles. They fired when idol immersed in the water. After coming from there, when I told the story to my grandfather, he was distressed. He told me never to go that village during Durga Puja. When I expressed my wish to shoot bullets from the gun in air, he made me to take oath that I would not do anything like that and never befriend with those who had guns/ weapons.

My village is in Munger district. Munger is a historical town and once was capital for few months during Mir Kasim era. Now Munger is famous for cigarette and Gun factory. Because of Gun factory, many locals learnt the skill of making weapons and they would prepare it in their home based workshops. Many times police raided such workshops and captured weapons as well as workshop owner. Despite of administrative restriction, local weapons were ubiquitous in the district and surround areas. As adolescent , I was very much fascinated with gun but that time due to the counseling of grandfather, I understood the term ‘legal weapon’ and ‘illegal weapon’.  I made a promise with myself, if I would fire the bullet in my life, I would do it with legal weapons only.

After three months of joining the Air force, we went for range firing practice. I was very excited about it. I had long cherished desire to fire the ammunition from the Gun and it was going to be fulfilled. In afternoon, the service vehicle carried us to range firing spot. The spot was separated by two sections, one was ground from where we were supposed to fire and, other was, from ground to slop of sand and earth. At the height of the slop, target was kept and we had to fire ammunitions from rifle and Sten gun, sixty ammunitions for rifles, and two magazines (perhaps 32 bullets each) for Sten gun. This was the first time I was holding weapons in my hand to fire. I heard the instructions of the instructor with rapt attention. After that, I took the position, put the bullet in the rifle, and pressed the trigger. Oh! I fired the bullet. The moment bullet went out of the rifle; I got a jolt at the shoulder from the butt of the rifle. I was mentally prepared for it as the instructor told about it at the time of briefing. Then after all sixty bullets I fired from the rifle. I was tired and my shoulder was hurt. After Rifle, I picked up the Sten gun. I was supposed to fire Sten gun in manual mode not in automatic mode. Manual mode means, every time one has to press the trigger to fire each bullet from the magazine and in automatic mode, one pulls the trigger once and it will empty the magazine. I was supposed to fire the Sten gun in manual mode but I did it in automatic mode. Within a moment, all the bullets from the magazine went out of Sten gun. It became so quickly that anyhow I controlled the muzzle of the weapon. My Instructor was very angry with me and he admonished me. I listened him silently but internally I was very thrilled as I experienced firing the Sten gun in automatic mode.

 After range firing, I was completely exhausted. I came to billet and went to bathroom. I stayed in the shower for almost two hours. I came out of the bathroom only when the water of the tank completely ran out.

~~~ Ramanuj Dubey

Adult Film in Cinema Hall --

 “Without hostel, student life is incomplete. Come and join hostel from tomorrow. We have captured seven number room of the hostel and I want you to join us.” Banti told me when I had come to give him some notes on chemistry subject.  I was hesitating, reason was that the hostel was in the hospital premises and it was illegal. During riot time in Bhagalpur, student of different colleges were shifted in hospital building and that building was converted into temporary hostel.  When situation became normal, students were asked to vacate the building but they did not do so. From then onwards, decade passed but the building was in the hand of students only. The senior/ other student used to take over the room, if any got vacate. Recently the students who were living in seven-room number vacated the place and banti took over the charge of the room. Before joining the hospital hostel, I consulted many people and most of them gave positive feedback of the hostel. Interestingly, police had also occupied two buildings of hospital during riot and they too continued to live there only. After giving much thought, I shifted in the hostel.

That was my first experience in hostel. There was unlimited freedom in the hostel. Anytime I could go anywhere from there and come back. Earlier I had never seen night show but after coming in hostel usually, I along with Banti used to watch night show only. One day while coming back from the night show, I saw a film poster with A written over it.
“Have you seen any adult movie earlier?”- Banti asked,
“No, I never used to watch movie. After coming here only I have started”- I replied.
“Hope, you are not regretting for it” – there was some dryness in his voice.
“Oh! No, I am glad, I saw many good movies recently”- I did not want him to be upset.
“Do you want to watch this adult movie?”
I did not reply. I wanted to watch it. Many students of our college had watched it and when they would talk about it, I used to feel isolated. They would talk, giggle and speak many code languages that I was unable to decipher. I thought if I would watch any adult movie then only I would be able to fathom their nasty talks.
“Tomorrow morning show, I am going to watch. If you want to watch it, you may accompany me”- he added.
“Ok. But do not tell anybody about it”- I could speak that much.
“Do not speak like that, you are not going to commit any crime”- Then I decided that I would also go along with him to watch the movie.

That was a very difficult night for me. I was tossing in the bed whole night. There was an excitement in my heart to watch first time adult movie, but I had a fear too- what if anybody sees me watching the adult film and inform about it to my family?  That time, I never hid anything before my sister. Even I told her about night shows and she did not approve my new adventure. I was in moral dilemma but 4am; I made up a proper strategy for watching adult movie. First, I would never tell my sister about it, as I have grown up now, I must digest such thing. Second, I would go to Hanuman temple before going to cinema hall. Third, Banti would purchase ticket from ticket counter and I would wait outside the cinema hall. When everybody would go, I too would go hastily in the crowd so that nobody would be able to see me.

There was a Hanuman temple near by the hostel. I went early in the morning and made a deal with god. “I would offer you Hanuman baba prasadam of worth eleven rupees, if nobody from my family member come to know about my watching adult movie "- with this deal I fervently prayed to him. After worshiping, I accompanied Banti until cinema hall. While he was purchasing ticket, I waited outside. When everybody was going inside the cinema hall, I too went there.
The cinema hall guard stopped me.
“What’s your age?”- He spoke sternly.
“Seventeen ’’- I blurted.
“Stand that side”- he pushed me from the queue. I was about to weep.
When everybody including Banti went inside, he came to me.
“If you want to watch movie, give me fifty rupees. You are underage, you are not suppose to watch this movie”- this time his tone was friendly.
The way he pushed me from the queue, I felt insulted. I had thirty rupees in my pocket, but I did not bargain. I gave him a stern look and left the cinema hall.

I straightway went to hanuman temple, and offered the prasadam of eleven rupees. Then after, I took auto for college.

PS: - Recently I came to know that the hospital hostel is still in existence. The hostel is in dilapidated condition and everybody lives there but student.

~~~ Ramanuj Dubey